If They existed

damn you, oh wicked hypnos

tonight you stole my dreams

you think you'll get away with it

and force me play your schemes?!

damn you, oh childish eros

for pointing those at me

you think that bending reason

would make a blind heart see?

damn you, oh aphrodite

for beauty and for charm

for watching from the distance

the break of my sword arm

you think that being angry

oh, ares son of rage

could bring the dead alive or

embower tears in wage?

i wish you dead, oh chronos

for ticking endless hope

for once i wish you frozen

to hold her or elope

damn you oh, gods! for playing

with one's own heart and mind

for writing these sad stories

and laughing unconfined.

Source of pep...

i'd nail my feelings down

if only i were right

about me being wrong 

about me being strong 

but this i cannot fight 

this light 

i must let in 

redeem the souls within 

give pulse to this old town.

even my words seem fake 

now let alone my life

around your will i crawl 

becoming cold and dull

would death come from a knife?

this strife 

must be withheld 

and peace at last be felt

and then be kept awake.

come, walk with me few steps

few breaths endure my stay

ignore this clutch of love 

forget the way i shove 

your feelings miles away.

astray 

i come, be found 

forgiven i come bound 

to show you love that peps.

ps: wrong rhyme... i know.

Not knowing...

existance is required for living

but not at all enough

my heart lives somehow due to loving

now i would wonder why would caring

not kiss the lips I cuff?

not knowing is a curse i'm used to

but i do not intend

my love for you to freely give to

this kite, most evil, nevermore true...

desire to comprehend.

they say truth will prevail in glory

and this we'll always trust

i carry pride from birth to hoary

i wish our lives would fit the story

since we all hit the dust

Thursday [need to know]

i need to know what people say

when death is strolling round their bed

i need to know what words to use

when you depart... 

what should I choose 

to keep your heart...

loving ahead?

should i allow the tears to fall...

and let you see i fret your loss?

i need to know what song to hum

when you collide 

should i keep mum [a tacea]

and just abide [a astepta]

for you to cross?

i need to know how does it feel 

when you come back from death or night

no need to strive for right or wrong

for i am here 

and i am strong 

for you my dear

...you're my delight.

should i predict the same result

based on ideas that love brought up?

i need to see a heart that works 

not pumping blood 

but taking walks 

closer to god 

on mountains top.

i need to know what silence is 

and clear your mind of my own thoughts.

i need to give you something real 

and hold you tight 

be sure you'll feel 

the troops that fight 

to clear the knots 

...of my unclear

[I did have some second thoughts about it, thou...]

i need to know why do i need 

a daily reason to be true 

to smile, to love, to cry, forgive

and care for life

so I may live .

to end this strife

what should i do?

i need to know why i'm obsessed

with more than just a mere "I"

who dared change focus on your heart

for loving "you" 

i changed the part 

where i was true

and made you sigh.

i need to know not just the truth 

i need to know your highs and lows 

i need this "us" to shut my eyes 

in rest of sleep 

while this night dies 

and i still keep 

the dream i chose.

i need not feel afraid again 

and guilt i want never this nigh 

i'm scared of being wrong like this 

of bringing pain 

a sower kiss 

a "me" you'd gain 

that makes you cry.

[...i'd rather die]

2215 [fara dor...]

cuvinte ce'am promis

ca n'or mai parasi

al meu piept plin de noapte

spre'auzul tau iubit

din nou au rupt tacerea... 

spre tot ce n'am dorit

ducand din nou durerea.

ma iarta, de se poate...!

convingeri ce'am ales

sa ma indrume ieri 

si azi si totdeauna 

imi macina cumplit

si tampla si dorinta

prin tot ce'a fost menit

sa'mi nasca iar fiinta

sa'ti puna iar cununa

prin vise ce'am dorit

aievea-mplinire 

ma uit plin de speranta.

iubirea mea candva 

inima ta flamanda

cu jar ar alina

si pret de o secunda

scapat de aroganta 

dor nu imi va mai fi...

[don't go... don't go... don't go... to sleep]